Keepsakes are reserved for potatoes that survive. Better luck next spud.
Their story
scenario
The Darkness of the Sack
Sir Reginald Roastbottom Jr. wakes up in a burlap abyss, surrounded by his weeping, dirt-covered kin. The air smells of damp earth and impending industrial processing. A giant, fleshy claw descends from the heavens, scattering light and chaos across his brown, starchy skin.
scenario
The Great Pantry Awakening
Sir Reginald Roastbottom Jr. wakes up in a damp burlap sack next to a half-drunk onion named Gary. The air smells like impending rot and forgotten New Year's resolutions. A giant, fleshy hand reaches blindly into the darkness, its fingers twitching with hunger for a side dish.
scenario
The Great Plastic Slide
Sir Reginald Roastbottom Jr. achieves a backflip so glorious it defies his lack of musculoskeletal structure. Instead of being crushed, he bounces off a worker's thumb and careens onto a high-speed conveyor belt. To his left, a giant spinning blade is turning his brethren into aesthetic crinkle-cuts, while to his right, a nozzle is spraying suspicious blue liquid.